Increasing Self-Awareness and Emotional Well-Being in Regards to Social Media

This is a chance to reflect on the nuances of how you interact with social media, the impacts those interactions have on your emotional well being, and how to feel the greatest sense of agency in your social media use. I certainly do not believe that social media is either all “good” or all “bad.” I absolutely believe that it is a great idea to pause and check in within yourself just as we check in during our sessions about things like sleep and how you’re feeling in your most intimate relationships.

Potential Drawbacks of Social Media

• Mindlessly scrolling through various social media platforms can be a way of “numbing out” and avoiding remaining present with what is going for you emotionally. Over time, this can make it more difficult to be in tune with yourself.

• Social media use can leave you more vulnerable to falling into comparison traps. Have you ever noticed that after spending time scrolling, you feel worse about yourself and aren’t quite sure why? Here are some common areas of life in which you may find yourself comparing yourself to others:

  • Financially: thinking that you should have more money, more expensive clothes, resources to travel more, etc. This can lead to feelings of not having enough or not being enough.

  • Socially: thinking that you are not as well liked as others, not as social as others, or not as fun as others. This can lead to feeling left out or isolated.

  • Physically: thinking that your body, face, or clothing is not attractive enough. This can lead to feelings of low self-esteem and self-objectification as the focus is on how you are seen, not who you are.

  • Emotionally/Spiritually: thinking that others are more positive, more evolved, or healthier. This can lead to pressure to perform your spirituality or emotional experience rather than to live and experience it.

  • Romantically: thinking that others have the “perfect” relationship. This can lead to feeling pressure to find or maintain an unrealistic version of intimacy. 

  • Professionally: thinking that others are further ahead in their careers or more successful than you. This can lead to feeling “behind.”  

• Challenges with sleep hygiene can occur when you’re unable to stop looking at social media before going to sleep or reach for social media first thing in the morning when you may still be waking up. This can make it more difficult to get a full night’s rest. 

• Sometimes it can be overwhelming to take in so much information at once. Whether it be challenging news like the CoronaVirus or election results, or simply a sensory overload of too many photos at once, sometimes it can just feel overwhelming! 

• Social media can make it more difficult to set boundaries with friends, family, or romantic partners. There may be information that others learn about you through social media that you had wanted to keep private, and sometimes it is hard to control what gets posted. Alternatively, you may learn information about others you had not wanted to know! 

Potential Benefits of Social Media

• Social media can be an amazing place to connect with others over shared interests. For example, maybe you notice an old friend of yours is reading a book you just finished and loved and you’re able to message about it. Or maybe you join a group to connect with others in your professional field. 

• There is amazing content put out by professionals in their field and incredible learning opportunities! Just last week, I shared some of my favorite Instagram accounts related to health at every size. 

• Keeping in touch with friends and family both locally and long distance can be much easier when you can so easily share photos, videos, and messages. Social media can help long distance loved ones feel closer, and can help you stay up to date on major life events with those you care about but may not be able to talk to regularly. 

• Social media can make you laugh! In the midst of a serious day at work or school, it can be a great intentional escape to read funny memes or watch a cute and silly animal video.

• Although social media can present the challenge of numbing out, it can also be a great way of intentionally mentally escaping the present, which might be necessary at times and that is okay! It’s okay if taking time to escape or numb out is what gets you through the day.

• Social media can normalize vulnerability and mental health concerns. With just a few clicks, you can see that no matter what you are feeling, you are not alone.

Tips for Managing your Relationship to Social Media

• Filter who you follow:Ask yourself how the content you consume makes you feel. Are there certain accounts that tend to make you feel poorly about yourself or trigger comparisons? Unfollow or “hide” anyone’s content that is emotionally challenging for you to see. On the other hand, you can explore hashtags that feature content that makes you feel good about yourself or teaches you about topics of interest to add to your feed.

• Make use of privacy features to honor your boundaries around how much you share and with whom. For example, you can create a close friends list or make your accounts private to maintain the boundaries you are creating in your offline life.

• Evaluate how much time you spend on social media and what purpose that has in your life. 

  • If you ever have the experience of looking up at the clock and not knowing where your time has gone after spending time on social media sites, it might be a good idea to take that as a good opportunity to ask yourself how you are feeling in that moment. You can even set a timer for 5 minutes and challenge yourself to not touch your phone/laptop/tablet for that time to re-group into the present.

  • Many people find it helpful to set a time an hour or so before going to bed to stop engaging with social media. You can always start with allowing yourself even 10-15 minutes! 

Reflection

Here are some questions to reflect on. Feel free to pull out a journal and free write! 

• What have I missed? 

• What is your relationship like to social media? 

• How old were you when social media was created? How did that impact your development from that point forward?

• Of the comparison categories listed, which category resonated most with you?

• What comes up for you when you think about taking a break from social media?

• What is the best part of social media for you?

• Can you think of a time when something you saw on social media negatively impacted you?